The best blog post ever written…ever!

this is literally the single greatest blog post you will ever read! honestly, it is genuinely the must-read piece of your life! it's the most insightful and brilliantly written post i've ever seen and what’s more is it’s the most completely hilarious article to be posted on the internet…ever!!!

now i'd love for this to be true, but i fear i need a few more years honing my wordy skills before i'm at chris morris/charlie brooker level. that being said, this superlative-laden opening is designed not only to boost my own ego, but to illustrate a point. a point about a prosaic plague of the english language that has been left to spread un-checked for too long now - i am of course talking about the everyday overuse of superlatives...

a superlative, for those who care to ask, is “the highest degree of comparison”. these are generally words that end in ‘est’ (best, funniest, greatest etc.). it is my opinion that superlatives should be saved for occasions which genuinely merit such a term, and yet they get passed around more often than a box of condoms in malaga! and i ask, why is this?

I think it might be because there is so much available to us today, that when we are faced with the tidal wave of information from the world wide web that we need to surf on a daily basis, we get scared. scared people won’t listen to us unless we bullshit and convince them their world will quite literally end if they don’t heed what we’re saying.

don’t get me wrong – superlatives have their place. as someone who works in pr, i am well acquainted with (overly) grandiose terminology. pr folk can find (or invent) a suitable superlative for any incident or event at the drop of the world's smallest hat. but you know what? i think it's high-time we stopped our daily diluting of words which were meant to be saved for those once in a blue moon events that genuinely warrant an 'est' or 'ever'...

par example; if the world's greatest writer composes a piece of wonderful writing which wittily and whimsically deconstructs the human condition, curing cancer, answering the call for world peace, successfully promoting equality of opportunity for one and all while simultaneously making us laugh harder than when a man gets a football kicked into his crotch, then, and only then, shall we be permitted to refer to it as 'literally the greatest/funniest/most interesting article’ – agreed? good.

I mean just think - how many times have you heard someone say; "you need to meet sandy, she is my best fried and she is the funniest and the sweetest girl in the world!" or "like, omg! did you see chad today? he is like the hottest and buffest guy i've ever seen!!"

answer: you've heard these type of things too many times. and no disrespect to sandy and brad here, but...they ain't. and d'ya know what? that's fine!

it's ok for things to be just 'ok' sometimes...it leaves room for the incredible, the spectacular and the remarkable! because these things are all around us in one form or another, and when these things do appear, wouldn't it be nice to pay them the recognition they deserve with words of such gravitas that they command people's attention? so that when we hear there is the 'greatest' or the 'funniest' or the 'most interesting' thing in the world happening, that we actually want to take a look for ourselves and not just dismiss it as another example of well-pr’d mediocrity??

so i implore you all to think about how we describe things before you go ahead and describe them – is that article really the worst you’ve ever read? think about it. was your day really the longest day in history? because chances are it was the same 24 hours as everyone else’s. is that film really the funniest ever made? oh it is? well in that case by all means go ahead and tell the world, because what the world loves more than anything else, is a tale of extremes! 

just a thought…